But it’s not your fault. It’s not just a matter of having a bad attitude or needing to “do better.” There’s always a reason behind these feelings. Perhaps you don’t feel like you’re growing in the right direction. Sure, growth takes time and experience, but it’s important to have the right environment and support to help you get there. Or maybe you find yourself comparing yourself to others and feeling like you’re missing out on something.
It can be scary to admit that you’re feeling stuck, but it’s the first step towards finding a solution. Once you start making progress in the right direction, you’ll be amazed at how unstoppable you become.
Look in the Mirror
The first step is to default to disclosure with yourself. Be harsh and honest. You can’t fix what you don’t know. It is hard to do it but once you face your fears, you will feel relief.
Here are some ways you can do that:
- Identify moments that bring you discomfort or pain and ask yourself why. Your feelings can be a valuable compass, pointing you towards situations or relationships that don’t serve you well.
- Assess your strengths and weaknesses objectively, without judging yourself. Take some time to reflect on your progress.
- Create a quiet, distraction-free space to reflect on your thoughts and feelings. You may find it helpful to take the Culture Amp course on Personal Development.
The second step is to seek feedback from others. Other people’s skills and experiences can help you identify blind spots and areas for improvement. Here are some tips for receiving feedback:
- Listen to feedback without arguing, even if you don’t agree with it at the moment.
- Recognize that it can be difficult for others to provide specific examples of unconscious behaviors. Ask for help identifying these behaviors in future situations by saying “Please point it out when I do it again”.
- Respect others’ time and appreciate their willingness to help you grow.
- Practice Feedforward instead of Feedback with your peers, asking for specific suggestions on how to improve. Consider taking the Culture Amp course on Essential Feedback.
Set Intention
Setting goals is essential for personal development and growth. By being proactive, you can take control of your life and learn from your experiences, even if they don’t always go as planned. Here are some tips to help you get started:
- Write your goals down on a whiteboard, making sure they are specific and not too abstract.
- Use the 4 stages of competencies and the STAR method to help you define your goals and track your progress.
- Go beyond ‘Good’. Ask others what the next level looks like and how you can improve.
- Look to good examples for inspiration and learning opportunities. Don’t compare yourself in a negative way, instead use these examples to set benchmarks for yourself and grow alongside others.
- Connect with people — share with them your goals and ambitions. It’s important to have a support system in place and to bounce ideas off of trusted individuals, they can’t help you if they don’t know where you are going.
- Take your personal growth seriously and others will too. When you invest time and energy in your own development, you’ll see the results and others will be more likely to support and encourage you.
In summary, setting clear goals and direction in your life can help guide your decisions and provide fuel for self-reflection. As you learn and grow, you can make course corrections and see the results of your efforts. Remember to be proactive, seek feedback, and connect with others who share your vision for personal development.
Guidance for Day-to-day
The good news is that improving yourself is possible, but it requires facing your inner struggles and putting in the effort.
However, don’t feel overwhelmed or discouraged. Remember, progress is a journey that happens one step at a time. Even small steps can make a big difference and empower you to keep going. And honestly, once you start, however small, maybe even before you take the first step, you will already feel that empowerment. From there, the only way is up.
If you compare yourself to three years ago, can you identify what has changed? What is still the same? Are there areas that you would like to improve? Do they bring you discomfort or do you accept them? Would you like to share a moment where someone helped you grow and gain a new perspective on yourself?